Best Funny Quotes


Posted by :Manish Kapoor

Total Comments: 2 comments so far (is that a lot?)

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.
Fred Allen

Borrow money from pessimists – they don’t expect it back.

I called your boyfriend gay and he hit me with his purse.

The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there’s a 90% probability you’ll get it wrong.
Andy Rooney

Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together.

STUPID = Smart Talented Unique Person In Demand

He who can, does – He who cannot, teaches.
George Bernard Shaw

Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.
Mickey Rooney

Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don’t believe the kids should be given homework.
BILL COSBY

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They’re about to announce the lottery numbers.
HOMER SIMPSON

A rich man’s joke is always funny.
Thomas Edward Brown

Nobody can get the truth out of me because even I don’t know what it is. I keep myself in a constant state of utter confusion.
Colonel Flagg

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